As far as reproductive rights and information are concerned, I’ve been feeling more and more like women in the USA are being slowly cornered, fed into the cattle chutes, poked with the electric prod, and pushed up to the bullshit troughs.

Take a look at Missouri’s brand new legislation, for example:

[x] People affiliated with abortion providers can no longer teach or supply materials for sex education courses in public schools, even though they are already instructed not to discuss abortion. Planned Parenthood will no longer be allowed to offer schools free materials.

[x] “Crisis Pregnancy Centers” will receive state-funded grants and are authorized to promote themselves with a public awareness campaign. Last year, an investigation conducted by the U.S. House of Representatives found that 87 percent of the CPCs receiving federal funds provided false or misleading information. Here’s just one example (of dozens*) cited in the report:

Having a baby is a normal process and what it does is fulfills a woman. It is fulfilling one of the roles that she has. Abortion is the exact opposite; she is doing something totally contrary to what her role is. That’s why it has such an emotional impact on women.

[x] Abortion clinics have been reclassified as “ambulatory surgical centers,” which means that several of them will face million-dollar renovations. At least one office may have to quit offering its abortion services even though all of its abortions are induced by medication, not surgically.

Not surprisingly, Missouri is also where I saw the “Embryos are Babies!” billboard that I so shamelessly spoofed.

*Here are a few more quotes from the report:

One center compared the experience of having an abortion to the experience of going to war, analogizing the post-traumatic stress experienced after an abortion to that seen in soldiers after Vietnam, and said that it “is something that anyone who’s had an abortion is sure to suffer from.”

One center told the caller that there is an “extremely high, increased risk of breast cancer” that “can be as much as an 80% increase depending upon how the risk factors fall into place.” A second center stated that abortion increases the risk of breast cancer by 50%. A third center asserted that an abortion elevates the average lifetime risk of breast cancer by 50% and that more abortions increase the risk even more.

Several centers described the risk of abortion-induced infertility as common or high. One told the caller that damage from abortion could lead to “many miscarriages” or to “permanent damage” so “you wouldn’t be able to carry.” This center stated that this is “common” and happens “a lot.”

Legislator Introduces Outrageous Homosexual Bill - Oh noez!
And here’s what’s so “outrageous”:

State Senator Sheila Kuehl has introduced legislation that will ban textbooks and teachers from any instruction that “reflects adversely” upon homosexuality, transgenders, bisexuals or those with perceived gender issues.

The article uses fancy terms like “reverse discrimination,” to distract from the point, which is that this kind of legislation is meant to prevent blatant bigotry and religious biases from promoting hate and intolerance through public schools.

Really, how do you get it across to these people that it is NOT okay to push personal beliefs and biases through public institutions?

Darwin and the FSM faithful are once again facing off with the almighty being in the fight for Kansas schools. I, for one, am rooting for “He who created all that we see and all that we feel” - the Flying Spaghetti Monster, of course.

In Tipton County, Tennessee, sex education has been outsourced to a pro-life, privately-funded Christian counseling center. The name of the new abstinence-only program is “Why kNOw,” which pretty much sums up its intentions to not teach anything about sex but how great it is not to have it. Forget that the vast majority of these kids will have sex at some point in their lives; they don’t need to be taught trivial information like how to protect themselves from STDs or unwanted pregnancy - everyone knows that nothing bad like that ever comes from sex when you’re married, and the 95% of Americans who’ve had premarital sex are just dirty whores who deserve what they get.